Are New Years Resolutions still a thing? I mean are there people amongst us that still set them, despite the fact that all the research tells us that very few people keep them (statistics tell us that 80% of people who set them have given up by February)?!
Maybe it’s the eternal optimists that set them each year, hoping this will be the year they stick! But as Einstein says, doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome is the definition of insanity.
The thing I’m not keen on about resolutions is that it’s usually all or nothing. It’s setting yourself up to fail. The very word, resolution, is defined as a firm decision to do or not to do something. Very black and white, no room for blurring. And when we set ourselves up to do that, to essentially never fail, to be perfect, we set the bar very high.
Now I’ve said before, I’m not against setting big audacious goals per se, but taking this approach leaves no room for error. You make a mistake, eat cake, fall off the wagon briefly, and you’re in what the heck territory. What the heck I’ve failed and might as well eat all the cake. What the heck I’ve failed and might as well have another bottle of wine. Feeling like, and labelling yourself a failure is not going to help you achieve your goals, because when you feel bad, you can’t be at your best or do your best.
The way to make lasting change is to do something consistently and the trick to doing something consistently is to make it manageable. Set the bar low. Don’t say you’re going to read a book a day, say you’re going to read a page a day. If you read a book a day, great, treat it as a bonus. If you only manage a page, well that’s all you committed to, and it’s easy enough to do. And you’re able to maintain it and be consistent.
If you’re serious about making changes in your life in 2019, here are some tips to help you be successful:
1. Have one goal.
Not a shopping list of all the things, just pick one, the most important one. This stops you being distracted, working out which goal is your priority today, and moving onto another goal when one gets a bit difficult. So stick with one at a time, nail it, then find your next one.
2. Know why you want it.
Sounds obvious I know but it’s important that you know your why and you remind yourself of it whenever you say your goal. I want X so that Y. Then you always know why you want it, which reinforces it and makes you more likely to stay on track.
3. Create habits to meet it.
Going back to the point about consistency, the best way to build consistency is to create a habit. Habits become something we do naturally, without prompting, like brushing our teeth morning and night. if you’re serious about the goal, build a habit that will help you achieve it. Do it consistently until the habit is formed and it comes naturally. If your goal is to read more, a habit of picking up your book to read when you get into bed on a night would help you read consistently and achieve your goal.
4. Celebrate your progress and your success.
This is one of the key things we should all do more of! If you’re taking action towards your goal every day then mark it down somewhere. Maybe write down the number of pages you’ve read for example. Seeing your progress and how far you’ve come is motivating and inspiring, it reminds you you’re capable and can do what you set your mind to. And we all benefit from being reminded of that from time to time!
So if you’re still planning on setting that resolution, use the steps above to help you set the right resolution and stick with it until you’ve achieved what you set out to.
If you have a specific goal you’ve been trying to achieve but haven’t made the progress you want, it might be time to think about getting a coach to help you make it happen. I have a couple of spaces opening up in the new year so if you’re interested just drop me a line and we’ll arrange some time to talk about how we can work together and make 2019 the year your resolutions stick.