This question could mean a couple of different things so I’m going to be clear that when I talk about your first coaching session in this blog, I mean the first session you have with a coach that’s not a discovery call. To find out more about discovery calls click here to read my blog post specifically on that subject.
So, you’ve had an initial conversation with a coach, sometimes called an introduction or discovery call, and you’ve decided to work with them. What can you expect from the first session?
Well, you’ve probably laid some of the groundwork in the introduction or discovery call already. When I host these calls, it’s important to me to understand what the coachee wants to achieve, so I know how I can help them.
The coachee probably talked about what they want to achieve at a fairly high level, so in the first coaching call, the coach will want to explore this in a lot more detail.
To help you achieve your goals, we need to get really clear on them, because as they say, you can’t hit a target you can’t see. So the coach is probably going to ask you a lot of questions that will get you thinking in more detail about what you want specifically.
Now if you’re anything like the majority of my clients, once you’ve articulated what you want in the discovery call, chances are you’ve then gone on to think about it more and your goals have evolved further already since then. That’s good, because thinking about what you want is an instruction to your brain. When you get clear about what you want, your brain, clever thing it is, helps you to get it. It starts to notice things that might help. And then points them out to you, often in the form of lightbulb moments and great ideas!
A good coach will use the first coaching session to really get this foundation right so that you’re clear what you want to move towards. Now, it’s not going to be tattooed on your forehead. It can, and likely will, change. But to change, you need to have something down in the first place.
I’ve mentioned questions already, but it’s likely that in the first session you have, you’ll be asked a lot of questions, to help you get more specific about that goal, and to help you explore it further.
Now if you like to be well organised and ahead of the game, you might be thinking that a list of the questions would be great, so you can prepare for the session? Well actually, it’s not that straightforward.
Firstly, the questions will evolve naturally based on the content of the session, so it’s not a repeatable approach. Every session is unique and whilst there is a framework used (I use GROW, read more about that here), no two sessions are the same.
Secondly, sometimes these questions might make you uncomfortable. When you’re setting and working towards goals, it can be hard. Doubts creep in. Beliefs you don’t know you have limit your thoughts and your responses. It’s the coaches job to guide you through this, and for want of a better phrase, “hold the space” for you. All that means is create an environment when you can explore what’s going on for you and feel uncomfortable but with someone else there to support and help you do that. To help you feel it and work through it. Sounds naff though doesn’t it, hold the bloody space?! 🤣
I think we can agree that all of this is going to make for an intense session, but that’s what you’re paying for. You’re paying for the results you want and the expertise of the coach to get you those results. Staying in your comfort zone is not going to get you where you want to be. If you want someone to tell you what you want to hear, well don’t come to me, or any other good coach. Harsh maybe, but true nonetheless.
Finally, given that you want to get the most out of your session, it’s best you are on the ball. When I’m being coached, I like to take fifteen minutes before (I block it out of my diary) getting into the right frame of mind to be coached. I find somewhere quiet, and make sure I won’t be disturbed or distracted. I make sure I have a glass of water, and a pen and paper to write things down. I close my eyes and take some deep breaths and find this really helps me to leave my day behind for a little while.
When you’re paying for someone to help you achieve your goals, you don’t want to turn up late, harassed, and feel on the wrong foot from the outset, so a pre-coaching chill out habit is a good one to build.
I hope that helps you feel prepared for your first coaching session. If you have any questions that I haven’t covered please do pop me an email.
